Whether you’re dealing with a rude customer, an unfair neighbor, or a demanding boss, it can be hard to know how to deal with difficult people. Here are some strategies you can employ to reduce your stress and increase the likelihood that you’ll leave the situation feeling okay.
不論遇到無禮的顧客、刁蠻的鄰居還是苛刻的老板，和難處的人打交道都不那么容易。你可以嘗試下面的辦法來減輕壓力、減少事發(fā)之后心里的別扭。
1. Listen to What They Have to Say
聽對(duì)方到底怎么說
Often, a willingness to listen can go a long way when you’re wondering how to deal with difficult people. Allow difficult people to share their opinion. Show that you’re willing to listen by making eye contact, asking questions, and showing an interest in what they have to say.
如果你不知道如何應(yīng)付難相處的人，那么主動(dòng)傾聽可以幫到不少忙。允許對(duì)方表達(dá)自己的想法，通過眼神接觸、提問或顯得有興趣來表明你愿意傾聽。
2. Place a Time Limit on How Long They Can Vent
允許對(duì)方發(fā)泄，但設(shè)定時(shí)間限制
Listening, however, doesn’t mean you have to listen for hours on end. Instead, place a time limit on how long you’re willing to listen to difficult people vent. Allowing them to repeat themselves over and over isn’t likely to be helpful in diffusing the situation.
傾聽并不表示你必須犧牲幾個(gè)小時(shí)來聽對(duì)方訴說。當(dāng)對(duì)方發(fā)泄時(shí)，試著設(shè)定時(shí)間限制，表明自己只能忍受多久；不要縱容對(duì)方喋喋不休抱怨，這對(duì)處理問題毫無益處。
Make it clear that you’ve heard what they have to say and that you don’t want to be subjected to hearing all their complaints over and over. Instead, try to move the conversation forward in a direct, yet polite manner.
明確告訴對(duì)方：你已經(jīng)知道他們說的是什么，不想遭受怨言的反復(fù)轟炸。直接而禮貌地將話題引開。
3. Don’t Simply Agree with Everything They Say
不要隨意應(yīng)和對(duì)方的每句話
Don’t simply nod in agreement to everything difficult people say. Otherwise, they’ll think you’re on the same page. Instead, be willing to say that you disagree, but do so in a respectful manner.
不要隨便附和對(duì)方說的每件事，否則他們會(huì)覺得你和他們是同一立場。你應(yīng)該得體地表達(dá)自己的不贊成。
4. Speak Up to Share Your Point of View
說出自己的觀點(diǎn)
It’s important to speak up at a fairly early point in the conversation to make it clear that you share a different point of view. Avoid interrupting, but instead, find a break in the conversation to say, “This is the way I see it.” Then explain your point.
對(duì)話一開始就應(yīng)該明確表示自己持有不同觀點(diǎn)。當(dāng)然，不要打斷對(duì)方，而應(yīng)在對(duì)話間隙說出“我的看法是……”，然后給出解釋。
5. Stick to the Facts
堅(jiān)持實(shí)事求是
Learning how to deal with difficult people often means sticking to the facts. Avoid sayingsubjective things such as, “You shouldn’t have…” or “That was way out of line.” Instead, state the facts and remain as objective as possible about the order of events.
和難處的人打交道，最重要的就是堅(jiān)持實(shí)事求是。不要講主觀的話，比如“你不應(yīng)該……”或“太過分了！”相反，請(qǐng)闡明事實(shí)，盡可能對(duì)事件條理保持客觀態(tài)度。
6. Work the Solution
找到解決措施
Avoid focusing on the problem for too long. There’s no need to place blame, rehash over and over why it was wrong, or just repeatedly point out the negative. Take responsibility for your behavior and then direct the conversation toward a solution.
避免在問題上糾結(jié)太久。沒必要去責(zé)怪、一遍又一遍哀怨為什么，或反復(fù)盯著消極面不放手。為自己的行為承擔(dān)責(zé)任，將對(duì)話引到解決辦法上。
Suggest several possible ways to solve the problem. Invite difficult people to do the same. Try to look for a solution that everyone can agree on.
提出解決問題的幾個(gè)可行辦法，帶動(dòng)對(duì)方一起想辦法，然后爭取找出一個(gè)雙方都能接受的措施。
7. Behave Respectfully
言行舉止要得體
No matter how difficult the conversation gets, maintain respectful behavior at all times. You can’t control how the other person behaves or reacts, but you can control your own behavior. Leave the conversation being able to hold your head high, knowing you conducted yourself in the most professional manner possible.
不管對(duì)話多么困難，也要隨時(shí)保證自己言行得體。你無法控制別人怎么說怎么做，但至少可以管好你自己。交涉時(shí)要表現(xiàn)出良好素質(zhì)，表明你能做得專業(yè)而得當(dāng)。
8. Agree to Disagree
保留各自意見
Sometimes you won’t be able to agree on a solution and it makes sense to simply agree to disagree. If you’re both on opposite sides of the fence and neither of you are interested in changing your minds, there’s no need to waste time trying to convince one another to think differently.
有時(shí)你無法贊同某個(gè)解決辦法，那就保留自己的異議。如果雙方都各持己見，都不愿做出改變，那也沒必要浪費(fèi)時(shí)間試圖說服想法完全不同的另一方。
9. Don’t Cave to Every Demand
不要應(yīng)承所有要求
Just because difficult people become demanding or aggressive, doesn’t mean you need to do what they say. In fact, giving in can reinforce their tactics. Be willing to say no when difficult people make unreasonable demands.
不要因?yàn)閷?duì)方相當(dāng)苛刻或盛氣凌人，你就任由他們頤指氣使。其實(shí)，你的遷就反倒會(huì)助長他們的氣焰。如果對(duì)方提出不合理的要求，請(qǐng)主動(dòng)拒絕。
10. End the Conversation if Necessary
必要的話，結(jié)束對(duì)話
If the conversation gets ugly, be prepared to end it. Don’t allow someone to become threatening or verbally abusive. Instead, make it clear you aren’t willing to hold conversations with people who treat you in a disrespectful manner.
如果對(duì)話變得越來越難聽，那就不要再溝通下去了。不要縱容對(duì)方變得咄咄逼人、甚至口出臟言。相反，你應(yīng)該明確表示不愿與粗魯講話的人進(jìn)行溝通。 |
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